My Very Own Stalker!!11!

The following is a very real conversation that happened a couple of weeks ago with my friend Jeff:

"Some girl just sent me a message on facebook saying she wants to meet up."-Jeff
"oh cool do it."-me
"No way she's like a stalker!"-jeff
"I think it would be kind of cool to have a stalker, I would be flattered."-me

So, the following is the story of my stalker ...ok...the word stalker in this case is a bit harsh, it's more like semi-stalker-in love with tanner'er (thats all one word). A couple weeks after the previously posted conversation I was innocently going about my business at work, at The Brick Oven (the whore of all the Earth), and I recognized the new dishwasher. I wont write her name on this blog for obvious reasons. She went to my high school and I had a class with her, she was a grade older than me. (Leisy and Laney might know who she is btw) She's pretty much crazy and has some obvious, but not so obvious, learning disabilities...and she's a control freak that wont take no for an answer. So because I was unfortunate enough to go to the high school that I did I knew this girl. Now me being really really ridiculously good looking, naturally she would have a crush on me, but being the psycho that she is decided to ask me out. so she tries once, I never responded. Second time, she specifies, ice cream, I was swamped that night. Next time I had a date... she started to follow me around a bit at work and come bother me while I was working. She invited me to her birthday party, me being a nice person said I would go to it, but when she would ask to hang out and get ice cream I started to be straight up blunt and say, "i don't want to."...for some strange reason she thought i was joking when i said no. So on friday night I saw her walking around (looking for me) and I started talking to a girl I work with about how this other girl always asks me out. I told her "i guarantee she comes and asks me out for ice cream." Low and behold five seconds later she comes up and asks me out for ice cream!!!! aaahhhhh. I said No, but reassured her that I would go to her birthday party. I was pretty excited to go to it...UNTILL my fake-girlfriend bailed on me at the last minute!!! (one of my good friends was going to pretend to be my girlfriend) but it turned out ok because I had called some people that know her and MADE them come to the party (we ate at The Brick Oven) . Five people, other than her, showed up to eat. It was very obvious that none of us wanted to be there. I thought everyone there was very...Christlike? for coming and being friends with her. I feel bad for this girl, but at the same time refuse to give her my phone number.... so yeah, moral of the story is, "be careful what you wish for, because you might get a stalker!"

The End