Right now I feel like:

Eating this:






























and some of this:





















and then doing this:






















or this:

teh zoo.

So it's friday night. I'm sitting here watching tv with Jarom. We have friends, seriously, but apparently they all went home after finals. i asked Jarom what i should blog about and he said, "how lonely you are?" Then i said, "what about things i don't like about BYU kids." So we're going to stick with that. thus the title "the zoo" and yes i know i wrote "the" as "teh." 50m371m35 1 5p3ak 1n 1337.

The list.

- they LOVE talking about their classes!
"what classes do you have this semester?"
"oh nothing big, calc, o-chem, anatomy..." yadda yadda yadda. BUT they love talking about their teachers even more!
"who do you have for o-chem?"
"oh really, i had him, hes soooooo hard." come on people don't you have any interests? hobbies? can't you talk about anything else? wow.
- they think they are really smart because they got good grades in high school, but they are not smart. anyone who studies all day everyday all semester and still gets a C is not smart.
- plays the piano in the wilk.
- gets dates at teh library
- white shirt and tie. crew neck sweater. V-neck, come on.
- pick up line of "what is your major" *used by girls*
- mission stories at church. why do RM's talk so much about their missions in sacrament meeting talks? because they haven't felt the spirit since then. zing.
- dont know how to cross the street!! and look both ways! don't use cross walks properly. a couple weeks ago i was driving down 800n. (you know it) and 3 guys bolt out into the road, not in a cross walk. they see me coming and keep walking, i think to myself, "that is not a cross walk, speed up" so i sped up and they realized i wasn't going to stop. i rolled down my window and yelled "that's not a crosswalk!" they were like 4 feet from me. it was great. then i resumed talking to my dad on the phone. i don't mind jaywalkers, but if you are jaywalking you better run across the street. dont expect me to stop for you.
- ugly couples that create ugly babies.
- 18 year old pregnant girls.
- says "there is nothing to do in utah" huh, exsqueeze me, a bacon powder? utah is the most beautiful place on the planet, trust me.
- they all claim to snowboard, but really are posers.
- DTR's.
- spirituality contests. one-upsmanship.
- whenever i see anyone walking to or from school they are ALWAYS on the phone! who in the hail are they always talking to? i use like 60 minutes a month.
- they like to use big words, in the wrong context, just to sound smart.
- add people on facebook that they don't really know, but hey, they're in the same network.
- honor code nazis.
- jarom doesn't like people giving him dirty looks when he doesn't shave. give him a break. he runs a tight schedule.
- girls that think they are clever and try and hook you up with their roommate. yeah, we see what is going on there.
- the sheltered kids who don't know anything about the real world.
- guys with neat and or shaggy long-ish surfer hair. it just seems like they are trying WAY to0 hard to be cool.
- take peoples reserved parking spots.
- butter faces.
- this is not true for all byu students, but a lot of them don't pay for school. sometimes i think "wow, doesn't this kid have a job? nope."
- girls that are VERY forward. physically.
- girls that go to school to get married. and don't really want to get a degree.
- king henry, liberty square, bellmont, rain tree, branbury, glenwood aka "glenhood."
- byu football.
- byu basketball, maybe i'll cheer for them if any of their players serve a mission for more than two months.
- RM's that think they speak their mission language better than the natives of that country.

that is it for now.
note: this list was made by a byu student, and possibly a future byu student (i might go to the u of u though.)

my very own christmas wish list

Dear mom (and everyone planning on getting me something:), this is what I want for christmas.

-canon 40d. 6.5 FPS!!!!
-armada jj's (jp vs. julian) 175's. really cool skis. powder skis.
-armada alpha 1. 176's. park skis.
-a custom Tom Ford suit, as seen in the latest james bond movie.
-nice jeans, you may purchase these at the rack if you would like.
-avalanche beacon. an item i need, but never want to use...
-a date.

ok but on a more serious note:
-nice jeans. not just wishful thinking like those other things.
-anything at BR
-ipod nano.
-shoes, you can never have to many pairs.
-t-shirts.
-CHURCH SHOES!! seriously. maybe brown and black. and belts.
-2 white shirts for church. one long sleeve and one short sleeve. super wide collar.
-2 or 3 ties :)
-socks. black gold toes, navy gold toes, black ankle socks, and white ankle socks.
-the massive. a ski flick by tanner hall. google it.
this is all i can think of for now...

Helpful information:
shoe size: 8 1/2 or 9.
pants: 30x32 at the gap and banana, but waist size 29 in expensive jeans.
shirt/sweater/sweater vest size: Medium.
favorite brands: oakley, the north face.

EDIT:
brands of clothing i will not accept: hollister, aeropostale, american eagle, RVCA (i don't live at bellmont, and i don't want to look like i do!), true religion's with the button down back pocket or weird stitching (same reason, although the non button down pocket ones are ok),

Lyrics

You may have noticed that I haven't blogged in a while. Laney asked if I am now to cool for school...er uh, to blog, because I can ski now. No, no, no, this is not the reason for my blogging absence. The actual reason for me not blogging is *drumroll* I couldn't decide what to blog about. I was going to blog about what a "man crush" is, due to me seeing the latest James Bond flick, then Jarom (my roommate) suggested writing about Opa! and my definition of it. Opa! was a folk dance performance at BYU we attended and everytime they would say "opa!" i would say, "i think that translates to Hail Yeah!" But I decided to blog about my favorite lyrics in songs. I have wanted to blog about this for a while now, so here we go. Basically these are just lyrics that I found to be catchy, deep, artsy fartsy, and/or clever.

Feel free to guess the artist and song titles in the comments section, correct answers will guarantee a great christmas present from me to you this year :) wait. ok. this is what ill do. you can guess, but ill put a link to each song so you can see what they all are after you guess. ps you may not be able to make a guess on all of these.

#1
"old friends walks pass goin bout their own
as is she is someone that they don know
then the king of kings lifts her off the flo'
sayin life is a ting where you learn to grow"

#2
"And although it seems heaven sent
We ain't ready, to see a black President, uhh
It ain't a secret don't conceal the fact
the penitentiary's packed, and it's filled with blacks
But some things will never change
try to show another way but you stayin' in the dope game
Now tell me what's a mother to do
bein' real don't appeal to the brother in you
You gotta operate the easy way
"I made a G today" But you made it in a sleazy way
sellin' crack to the kid. " I gotta get paid,"
Well hey, well that's the way it is"

#3
"Samson went back to bed
Not much hair left on his head
Ate a slice of wonder bread
and went right back to bed"

#4 *I do not endorse these lyrics, they're just funny*
"And I dont have a drinking problem
I drink, talk *bleep*, fall down no problem
When i drink its a problem, cuz I cause problems"

#5
"To the lovely dancing lights, I begged, "May I cut in?"
But they never stopped playing "their song"....

"In the shadow of a star, in static pallor
I realized I, never began"....

"You land as lightly as the new snow, cinematic
Onto the melting boy, and melt away
You light as gently, you're so, cinematic
Bathed in your radiance, I melt"

#6
"I saw your eyes,
And you made me smile;
For a little while
I was falling in love.

I saw your eyes,
And you touched my mind.
Although it took a while,
I was falling in love.

I saw your eyes,
And you made me cry;
And for a little while
I was falling in love"


ok, that is enough lyrics for now. guess away.

Answers:
#1Link
#2Link
#3Link
#4Link
#5Link
#6Link

our FHE movie!!!!

ok, seriously, this is the funniest thing you will see today. in my singles ward each FHE group was assigned to make a movie, then we will have a ward party to watch them all. the group i was in was told to make a romance. we wanted everyone to be in it so we made short clips of dates from a lot of stereotypical byu couples! enjoy! it is 10 min long but goes by very fast, no joke.

on youtube CLICK HERE!!!!

.

It's Official

Welcome to my multi-post, enjoy.

What is official?

#1 I went skiing for the first time this year. November 7th, opening day at snowbird. Thus I am officially a busy person again, maybe even too busy for a girlfriend.

#2 It's official, President Elect Obama. I am not anti-obama like many utahns, but i am anti to obama supporters. i hate to be the one to break it to them that in 4 years they will still be dirt poor and living in the projects, because they are lazy, don't work, and don't go to college. obama will not be your savior. They all seem to think that they will all become rappers or NBA players...

#3 I officially learned what to do with spoiled milk. you put it on someone else's doorstep. Yesterday i noticed my milk was pretty chunky so i put it on the counter to take out with the trash...10hrs. later i decided to take it out and Jarom says, "where you going with that? you should probably put it on some girls porch and let them deal with it." So i did.

#4 Heroes is officially the best show to ever come on tv. You should be watching it weekly. Monday nights at 8pm.

mission accomplished!

My picture got into the Ensign!!! w00t w00t. Conference issue Page 40. I look like a total NERD! i think its because the photographer took it at a funny angle, but i made it nonetheless.

ps i swear i ironed my shirt that morning!



ps yall should put it up on your fridge!

Static

I hate it when my pants and shorts stick to my legs. Stupid Static. Anywho, I got sick of it the other day so I decided to shave my legs, not perfectly smooth, but with the sideburn trimmer on my electric razor. So I shave one leg, the left one, and then the battery died. Oh stink. So I have been going around for three days with one leg shaved and one not shaved. I have been busy. I think ill shave (trim) the right leg today...after I go to the bank. goodbye static.

Ibuprofen

4 tablets (200mg each) takes exactly 45 minutes to kick in, lasts for 4 hours. Then repeat.

Long story short I had two tooth aches. After I got the second one fixed the dentist gave me a couple 800mg Ibuprofen. They worked wonders, then I ran out. The teeth were still really sensitive, thus requiring more Ibuprofen even though the teeth were fixed.

Above you can see how i was using Ibuprofen. I just read the real directions on the bottle, here they are:

-Do not take more than directed.
-The smallest effective dose should be used. ***Broke this one, after I ran out of the big 800mg Ibuprofen I woke up in the middle of the night in pain. So I go to the bathroom and pour the Ibuprofen into my hand, and think, "hmmm so the big ones were 800mg, that means I need to take 8 of these smalls ones." I get into bed and think, "oh crap I just took 8 200mg tablets...thats like...oh crap!"
-Do not take longer than 10 days, unless directed by a doctor (see warnings). * Did this too.
-Take 1 Tablet (200mg) every 4 to 6 hours while symptoms persist. ***One? lol.
-If pain or fever does not respond to 1 tablet, 2 tablets may be used.
-Do not exceed 6 tablets in 24 hours, unless directed by a doctor. ***oops.

Stomach bleeding warning: This product contains a nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drug (NSAID), which may cause stomach bleeding.

What I did wrong: took way too much!!!! haha basically like 20 in one day. I think my pee even smelled like it.

Well my roommates think i'm addicted to it now. My mouth hurt! It's getting better now. I think i'll quit cold turkey, basically so my stomach doesn't bleed! Hopefully I don't die anytime soon due to Iburofen...poisoning.

all in a fortnight...well maybe just one night.

My living room is one large fort! Furnished with both our couches, a table, and tv. This is a true story I have pictures to prove it. A couple weeks ago Jarom and Rachel were talking about making a fort...nothing really came of it, untill now. I guess thy used to make forts when they were little. My sisters and i never really did this. We played "cushion day," We took all the cushions in the house and put them at the bottom of the stairs, then jumped onto them :) So on monday night the magic happened! The crew consisted of: me, Jeff, Jarom, Mike, Missy, Rachel, Becca, Emma, and Anne showed up late. The following is the photographic evidence that this fort was and still is real:

The Begginings












This is the guard. we decorated him with my new mullet wig and glasses. then missy, the resident art major, drew him a body.












The top of it!












This pic is taken through the entrance, through the kitchen table.












The two masterminds at work.












It got scary in the fort.












GIRLS LOVE JUMPING PICTURES!





















Then rachel wanted to take gongsta pics, so i got out my bandanas.

Ensign/Liahona Aspirations

The following is my surefire plan to get a picture of me in the Conference edition of the Ensign/Liahona:

I have been home from "the mish" for a little over 2 1/2 years, long time right? In that time I have not seen any of my former companions. I had 11 companions, 10 of them are from africa; South Africa (4), Madagascar (1), Zimbabwe (1), Kenya (1), Uganda (2), Ghana (1). My companion from Ghana, Elder Brown, attends BYU-I. Janna attends BYU-I. I called Janna and had her give him a ride down here to Utah for conference/mission reunions. So she did. Before they came Sylvester (Elder Brown) informed me that he had conference tickets to the sunday morning session! w00t! Never seen motab in person. So we went to mission reunions (two) and had some fun. He visited his "lady friend" from Ghana who is going to BYU.

So on saturday I had a genius idea! You know how when you look through the pictures of the conference Ensign/Liahona they only put "ethnic" looking people in it? You know where i'm going with this right? Sylvester and his friend are black africans. I told Sylvester and his "lady friend" that our goal for the day was to get in pictures taken by Ensign photographers! They thought it was a good idea. The session ended and we started walking around. When we saw photographers we would walk past them multiple times. Then we were walking behind some regular white people and the photographer takes their pic. We walk past and I say to Sylvester, "that was messed up, he should have taken our picture." Out of the corner of my eye I see the photographer walking up to us, "can I take your picture." We accepted. We stood there and smiled while he took a bunch of pictures, changed settings and positions then took more. We walked away satisfied. They take thousands of pictures, but I think our chances are pretty good. A white guy and two native africans, very diverse, you know, like the church. Oh, and conference was great!








here are some pics of elder brown and I:

Elder Brown all thugged out.
















the fav.

fishing in the deep end?

I find dating to be...well, I just don't like it. Most of the time I feel like i'm wasting my time and or money. Maybe it's constantly getting owned by girls (the S means it's plural) who express interest in going out with me, or even suggest, "we should do something sometime." And yet, they are always busy. Tuesday? Wednesday? Whenever. I can get work off. No. Ok. Nevermind. Maybe i'll ask out someone who can fit 2 hours of going out with me into their busy week. Some girls tell me they will go out with me, but then end up "busy" and I think they really didn't want to go out with me in the first place. Girls need to know that they can say no. Don't even get me started on double dates, why would i want to get to know my friends date? Sometimes I come up with excuses to not ask girls out, girls that I normally might want to go out with. Some of these excuses may be shallow...here are a few:

-too tall.
-too short.
-overweight.
-too thin.
-canckles (woof)
-doesn't like country music. for reals?
-coworker.
-in the ward.
-way to much makeup.
-flat hair.
- wears clothes from american eagle/hollister. like everyday.
- brown eyes? i like blue.
- talk about x-boyfriend
- talk about "their missionary," woah. red flag. of all the missionaries i knew that had girls waiting for them back home about 85% of them went to the movies and kissed girls. srsly. girls that religiously wait get what they deserve, a husband who will ignore them and watch football every sunday.
- too...indie. indie girls are super cute BUT they have the ugliest haircuts ever! (truly indie girls that is. some girls dress indie but have normal short haircuts) it's like they got the kitchen scissors and did it themselves.
- doesn't like The Simpsons.
-always has a boyfriend, different guy every week.
-still dates pre-mees.
-a roommate or friend is in love with them. bros before hoes.
- have already gone out with their roommate, sister, or cousin.

Maybe i'll overcome my dislike for wasting my time and money and date more, we will see. I seem to attract the weirdest girls! Hopefully soon a girl that I want to date will actually want to go out with me. It's almost ski season :) then it wont matter that I don't have a girlfrind, and i'll be the one who is too busy.

ps i just submitted my application to byu for january. please pray for me to get accepted.

Priceless Pictures of People Peeing

My friends and I do a lot of outdoorsy stuff, hiking and backpacking mostly. Do not confuse this with camping, why camp when you can sleep in a bed? While playing in the great outdoors, occasionally, people need to go pee. I always have my camera ready for such instances :) Here are a few shots that I found while going through pics on my computer.

Nate. Hiking outside of Cedar City.















Nate. Hiking Box Elder Peak.















Rick. Canyoneering in Zion National Park.















Trevor. Canyoneering in Zion National Park.















Elder Solomampiononona (from Madagascar), he had to pee every 5 minutes...i'm not kidding!








Elder Bucwa. Notice the outhouse 5 feet from him.








Taxi driver.









Sometimes i get caught.
Hiking Buckskin Gultch.















Hiking Timp.

To the owner of the gold Hyundai:

You have parked your ugly gold Hyundai in my underground parking spot. This is the third time I have come home to find your crappy car in my spot. The underground parking is NOT open game, 12 apartments and 12 parking spots, see the correlation between the number of parking spots and the number of apartments? The large number "8" spray painted on the wall means that it is my spot. So, if you don't live in number 8, which you don't, don't park in that spot.

I know who you are, thanks to my handy dandy ward directory. Kinda funny how only one guy in the ward is from Oregon, right? You live in number 12, thus if you are going to park in the underground parking lot you must park in the number 12 spot. If one of your roommates has already parked there you may park behind the building, those spots are all free game. If, by chance, all of those spots are taken you cannot park underground in the number 8 spot, and therefore you must find a spot on the street. I know it may be hard to find a spot on the street. Sorry. I'm mostly sorry that you have not figured out what the "8" on the wall means...

This is visual proof:








This is where you should park:













Just in case you don't know where the street is...

The Great and Spacious Building of NBC

Why do I compare NBC with The Great and Spacious Building?

NBC was the television network covering the Olympics this year. They did a HORRIBLE job. I feel that the true fans of the Olympics were not taken into account when they decided what they would show on tv. Instead they decided what events would attract Joe Schmoe American, who really doesn't give a rat's butt about the Olympics, but just wants to watch it.

As you may know I ran Track and Field and Cross Country in high school. I would refer to myself and a Track Junkie! I check track websites and forums almost daily. If there has been a large track meet anywhere in the world I probably know about it. Not just during the Olympic year but every year. So what events do I want to see on my tv during the Olympics? TRACK I wanted 800m, 1500m, 5000m, and 10000m. Thats it! Did I get it? Some, at 2am.

Instead I get hours upon hours of those BUTT UGLY volleyball girls. Seriously, do we need to see them celebrate for 20 minutes after they win? couldn't NBC have switched after the match was over to another event? NO, because apparently Joe Schmoe wanted to see May-Trainer sprinkle her mother's cremated body onto the sand, how sweet.

Also, I got a face full of Michael Phelps. He did great, obviously. Yes I enjoyed watching him win so many events during the first week of the Olympics, BUT I hated how NBC WHORED his name on everything dubbing him the "Greatest Olympian of All Time." You can now buy a special DVD about him produced by NBC. Just because he won the most gold's, at one games, doesn't make him the greatest Olympian ever. (for an in depth analysis about why he is not the greatest olympian ever go to Nate Houle's blog, he will argue that Usain Bolt is just as good if not better. How swimming is 0 impact on bones and joints, enabling you to do more events, all of Phelps' races were about the same distance using the same kind of muscle fibers (fast twich) and yadda yadda, how it's not possible to do all events in Track. should be good. Link) If Usain Bolt were American we would be seeing NBC pimp his name on everything. And even though swimming had been over for a week I was still seeing his ugly mouth on my tv, while they could be showing me Track.

Here are a few examples of what NBC did wrong:

"Live" coverage...not quite. Try 40 minutes after. If you went to nbcolympics.com you would see the results and pictures of events that were supposed to air "live." example: I knew Phelps won the 100m butterfly, even though at the right of the tv it said, "live."

Mens Steeplechase Final: The day of the steeplechase final NBC showed 1h 30m of the 20km Racewalk...seriously the race walk? Then they showed 2h 30m full coverage of the Womens Marathon, both favorites dropped out and no americans running. They show both those races, THEN I have to stay up till 1:30am to watch the Steeplechase (which is a very exciting event to watch due to the water pit) So it finally starts, after a lap and an half they cut away to the womens high jump! Then after that they cut to a commercial! NO JOKE! Then they come back to the race, almost over. the race was won in 8min 10sec....An 8 minute race!!!! and they can't show all of it, but they show ribbon dancing?!? ALSO that night during prime time they showed the women's Pole Vault, cool, but as they showed it you could see the winners of the Steeplechase taking their victory laps! ummm hello NBC.

Also the did not show full coverage of any distance events, ALL were shown later than 1am. Ever heard of Bekele? no. NBC failed you. He only won the 10k and the 5k. Both were Olympic Records (he holds both world records) and the fashion in which he won was so impressive. Just blew everyone away. The 5k was probably the best 5k ever ran, he led the whole race, which is tactical suicide, then blew everyone away the last two laps. running a 12:57 an OR. That is 3.1 miles. 4:10 per mile! The last mile was 3:58!

At the bottom right of the TV it would say stuff like "phelps in 30" and show a little clip of him....well they did that with the 100m and it said, "Bolt in 23min" and IT SHOWED HIM WINNING the race! What if i wanted to be surprised? Nope, more than once during Track they told us who won before they showed it. Thanks.

The guy doing the interviews at the track was a jerk! After Lolo Jones caught the 9th hurdle and lost the race, he asks her to describe it. Then after Wallace Spearman gets bronze in the 200m, but then gets DQ'ed for stepping on the line. The guy says, "you got disqualified, you stepped on the line. How does it feel to lose your bronze?" Or defending champion in the 400m Jeremy Wariner after he gets second, "do you think you got second because you switched coaches?" Wariner walks away.

What were the original Olympic events? Track and Field. Stick to the basics. I guarantee there are more hard core track fans than gymnastics or swimming. Who watches gymnastics outside of the Olympics? Nobody.

I just wanted to rip that crappy rug of off Bob Costas' head and punch him in the face. If it weren't for Heroes and The Office, the best two shows on tv, I would never watch NBC ever again. Did I get my point across? If not I've got more ammo.

i talk in my sleep...well thats just what i hear.

I moved out of the house a couple months ago which means I now have a roommate. Having a roommate means that there is someone to hear/tell me all the things I say in my sleep! So here are all the things I have said in my sleep that my roommate has heard and remembered:

Two months ago: *mumbling* "...all the ponies."

Two weeks ago (this is my personal favorite): "more flames, more sparkles, oh yeah!" I can only imagine what i was dreaming about here!

The other day: Jeff (my roommate) said I screamed at the top of my lungs, waking him up: "NO MORE BLACK SUITS!" Hahaha. The funny thing here is I remember two of my dreams from that night, neither of them had black suits. I had a dream where I had a Mexican girlfriend and we went fourwheeling. And another dream where my teeth were all rotten and gross, this was a nightmare! but nothing about black suits....oh boy, again I can only imagine.

*disclaimer* Dear girls who may want to marry me, this is not an every night occurrence! I DO NOT snore, I DO NOT grind my teeth, in fact I am a very light breather, sleeping next to me you might think I was dead, if I wasn't screaming about black suits that is.

Charade, Random Thoughts, Shamless Plugs.

Do you have a nap movie? You know, a movie that kind of puts you to sleep. I do, it is "To Catch a Thief." It is a great movie, but I can never stay awake while watching it! I have had to sleep at the house instead of my apartment the past couple of days. Janna and my mom are in NYC so I am "baby sitting" Kate and Penny. So friday night I got to the house at 1am, I wasn't very tired and needed some sleep so I looked for the dvd of To Catch a Thief, but I couldn't find it! I did find Charade. I have seen it a few times and liked it, but this is an old movie maybe it would put me to sleep? Nope. The opening scene takes place at a Ski Resort and the dialogue between Reggie and Peter (that was his name at the time) is just awesome! I'm hooked. I had to turn it off so I could get some sleep then watched the rest of it in the morning. Great flick. My roommate Jeff has never seen it so I'm going to throw a party, i'll invited lots of people and then Jeff and I will watch it because nobody ever shows up to our movie nights. Note to self: when trying to sleep don't watch Charade, stick to your guns, To catch a Thief.

Olympics started :) don't bother me during the Track and Field events....or else!

Which birthday party do I go to today? I have been invited to two parties. Maybe I'll try and hit both....more junk food :)

Anybody want to go see that new mormon movie about the sister missionary?....psych!

I miss my rat tail...

No Nap sunday is what I have called today. A sunday without a nap is a sunday wasted...unfortunately today was "wasted."

Janna is in NYC check out her blog. (link to the right)

Nate Houle recently created a blog, check out his post about the olympics, it's good. (link to the right)

Check out Laney and Taylor's blog. Their baby Hank looks like Voldemort in the second picture down. (link to the right.)

the solitude of my sunday saunter

After Sunday dinner I arrived at my apartment only to find it empty. Where was everyone? I didn't know, so i decided to go for a walk. Naturally I brought my camera. (warning: lots of pics.)

ps. you can click on the pics to enlarge them.

I found a place with Women for rent










I was alone...










I didn't feel like sitting










I was walking on that creepy path that goes along rape hill, I went off the path and got my favorite shoes muddy. so I took a sock off to wipe them off and then i threw the sock in the bushes cuz i didn't want to carry a muddy sock home....moral of the story, don't go off the straight and narrow path.
















Near the RB










ummm dont park here, unless you're doing a service project.










I still didn't feel like sitting.
















I don't know what this is...
















Stairs. See the symmetry?










There are flowers on campus










I took some self portraits










Another










I walked across the street.
















Library










Looks like a window is missing...i wonder if byu knows?










tthhhhtop!
















Last one. I swear.

wanna sit by me?...no. ok.

Nobody likes to sit by me. Seriously. Especially girls. I don't know what it is. Over the past few months I have noticed that girls never sit by me when a group of people are watching a movie or just hanging out. Only when there is one seat available in the whole room will people sit by me, sometimes girls choose the floor, no joke. I will relate my most recent experience, but keep in mind I have hundreds of examples that I could use: Some people in my ward decide to have a Brain Regan night (he is a comedian), sweet I'm in. I go over, two people are already on the couch (holds 3 people comfortably, 4-5 if you squish) so I sit on the love seat (holds 2 people comfortably, 3-4 if you squish). So I'm sitting there, by myself I might add, against the arm so more people could fit. A girl walks in and sits on the couch, I didn't want to sit by her anyways. Another girl walks in...she asks people to squish so she can fit on the couch. I'm sitting by myself still..."whatever, shes not very pretty, I must be super lame if she doesn't even want to sit by me." People on the couch: 4. People on the love seat: 1.

Why don't girls sit by me? Here are my theories.
#1 I'm ugly?
#2 I smell funny? (probably not though. If I smell like anything it's that new orange dove soap, old spice, and chanel)
#3 I'm short
#4 I'm ugly..oh already said that.
or
#5 I'm really good looking and intimidate girls so they are to shy to sit by me...maybe i'll marry the next girl who actually sits by me.

I don't know. Maybe I'll just stand up till everyone sits down, then I can choose where I want to sit, then I don't need to sit on the love seat by myself anymore....I'll just end up on the floor.

ps I was going to blog about the Louis Vuitton sweatband that i want :) I saw Lil' Bow wow wearing it in his latest music video. It's just a normal sweatband worn on your forehead while playing sport. so I checked out their website...it was in the womens collection...and only sold in a package deal 2 wristbands, sweatband, and a towel...$300....maybe ill find a fake one :)

Couple Missionaries...jerks? (yeah i said jerks)

Saturday mornings at work start out pretty slow. There I was minding my own business walking around pretendning to be busy so managers wouldn't ask me to do stupid stuff, like go on a delivery or scrub the floor. All of the sudden an old man flags me a down and tells me all about the hole in the bottom of his mug. I inspect said mug,then tell him there is no hole in it. I tell him how it was put in a freezer while wet, then it froze, then it was pulled out of the freezer, root beer was poured in it and overflowed and froze to the outside of the mug, then melted at room temperature on his table. He insists about the hole. I tell him that i'll get him a new one and put his old mug in my bus tub walk around the corner and see him tell his server about the hole, she explains the same thing as i did. It's simple science really. After she left the table I hear the woman say to her husband, "they shouldn't have argued with you." I guess he was really mad. I walk back over and say to the server, "it's ok i'll get them a new one." I was doing something and had to walk to the end of the row of tables. i turn around and overhear this conversation:

*I start walking towards them*

old lady -- "it's ok hun, you're smarter than he is."

WHAT! She and I make eye contact, but she thinks I didn't hear it! Oh yeah, did I mention they were a couple serving a mission! wearing their nametags! I call them Elder and Sister Humble.

I go to the drink station pretty offended, "that old man is a retard, no one is smarter than me. how dare this woman say that! and she's a missionary, that was christlike..." I reach for a mug in the deepest darkest corner of the freezer, it was still morning and they were nice and frosty! I grab the best looking mug, fill it with ice and filled it with root beer. After the mug was at a perfect level I must have accidentally let my finger slip and I overflowed it and the root beer froze to the outside of their mug, oops. Then i did it again. And again. Untill the whole outside of the mug had frozen root beer all over it. oops. I grab a new coaster and set it on their table, "there you go sir." Five minutes later it looked as if there was a hole in this mug too! What a shame, two in a row with holes, their table was a swimming pool of root beer and they used all their napkins to mop it up. I wanted them to complain about it, because I was going to say, "oh I thought you were smarter than me... so i assumed there was a hole in your mug, looks like I was right, sorry about that." but they didn't say anything, just got quiet when I would walk past. And they gossiped about it the whole time! Shame. I asked the server what mission they were in so I could write their president about how rude they were to me, but I guess it was just a church history mission.

p.s. Dear Elder and Sister Humble, Please don't come back to the Brick Oven, we are the highest grossing restaurant in utah and don't need your business nor your stingy senior citizen tips. With Love, Tanner.

pps maybe the church ought to "raise the bar" for senior couples too...

the deep thoughts of Nicholas Tanner Mills

Have you ever looked at me and thought, "I wonder what Tanner is thinking about..." Well, i'm going to tell you :) On Monday I did some canyoneering in Zion National Park. We did a trail called Mystery Canyon, it was fun. Anywho these are a few of the things that I thought about in the car on the way home. My thoughts are in the quotes. enjoy.

"I need to pee pretty bad...good thing we are stopping for dinner"

At the Carls jr - "why are all the meals $7?..they better be dang good."

I'm in the middle bench in a minivan, Kim Houle and her coworker Dayna are having a conversation in the front seat - "kinda weird how i have been listening to them and haven't jumped in the conversation...i always have something to say...where is the ipod."

After trying to sleep and actually sleeping for about 30 minutes (it was about 10pm when we left Cedar City) and I had the only seat [b]without[/b] a head rest - "aaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh my neck is killing me!...*i look around* hmmm i wonder if this kid would notice if i sneakily took his head rest, he's not even using it. *i reach over about to take it* ...naw."

"nice we are almost to Delta *two or three minutes pass*...wait thats Fillmore..*i hang my head a bit*"

While scrolling through the ipod - "I don't want to listen to any of this crap...wait, i'll listen to that band that has no words...whats it called...parker (my friend parker cross, i skied with him a lot last winter) showed them to me..*i scroll for a while* Mogwai! thats it.."

While looking at the moon "hmmm nice waxing cresent...or is it a waning cresent...maybe thats why i got a B (astronomy class)."

While looking at a mountain - "i could ski down that. *a few minutes pass* should i get some tight ski pants...naw i like the thug baggy look too much *a few more minutes pass* the ski industry is getting to artsy for me, i'm not though...wait i'm listening to music with no words...crap."

"yes the silhouette of timp!...*minute later* crap its nebo *hang my head farther this time*..this is the longest road trip ever."

"i need to pee again...i can hold it."

"Springville! almost home...oh man i could really go for some stouffer's lazag (i guess thats what i call lasagna in my head) right now...wait is stouffer's in provo or springville?"

Dear Bloggers...

Dear Bloggers, I have made two major realizations and thought I would share them with you.

#1 I have realized that some people who blog choose for some crazy reason to have a dark background with light wording. Color mixtures i can think of right now are black and white, dark blue and cream, dark green and yellow...ok you get the picture.
#2 Secondly I have realized that my eyes hurt after i read these blogs. When i finish reading I look up at the wall and I can see lines all over it! did someone paint my wall? I tried to focus on the words on the wall to see whos blog was written on my living room wall, but i failed and couldn't focus...just saw more lines. Then I think to myself, "gosh dang i need my glasses." -- I wear glasses to read btw.

Moral of the story: blogs with dark backgrounds and light wording make peoples eyes hurt. especially my eyes. The End.



PS something i'm obsessed with and forgot to mention in my last post: the color lime green.

PPS i got a haircut. i was going to get an even sicker mullet/rat tail, but after my friend Christie finished it we agreed that it looked retarded and super white trash!!! so we cut the rest of it off. so i have a missionary haircut. my mom loves it :) but i keep reaching to my neck to play with my hair and its gone. its weird not to have 2 inches of rat tail to play with lol. im still getting used to it, my neck is cold. but my hair looks really good ...i like it.

stupid stuff i'm obsessed with

- rat tails/mullets...they are cool, well at least i think so.
- slicked down side parts.
- chocolate milk. i paid 5 bones for 2 gallons at the byu creamery! wtf...now that i think of it ill drink a cup of it while i finish this post :)
- oatmeal cream pies 10/$10.00 at virtually every grocery store.
- girls that wear skinny jeans and cute but flat shoes.
- reverse camber/rockered skis. basically they bow in the opposite direction for optimum flotation in powder.
- canon EOS 40d ...6.5 fps. retail price $1299.00ish...she will be mine someday.
- watching the SOAPnet channel and trying to explain "one tree hill" and "the oc" to my roommates. i would hate for them to not understand.
- watching planet earth.
- pens that double as lazer pointers, soooo much fun :)
- ironing my sunday clothes.
- shoes. i like to wear 2-3 different pairs everyday. i sometimes leave them in the living room of my apartment (currently have 5 pairs in here) my roommates dont like it.
- the word "rad."

thats all i can think of for now, maybe ill add more stuff later.

The most underrated city in utah...

TOOELE! you're probably thinking, "wtf? did he say Tooele." Yes i did. I went to Tooele with Nate Houle last Thursday to go bowling. Long story short we have a friend from Oklahoma who is staying in Ogden for the summer, he asked us to meet him in Tooele for a little bowling. On the drive up we went through SLC then took I-80 west, we had to work pretty hard at not barfing while passing Magna (it smells really bad), this made me a bit worried about being in Tooele. A couple miles later the air smelled normal again, giving me a little relief. We passed The Great Salt Lake, while listening to a song called "The Great Salt Lake." The lake was really cool looking, almost looked like the ocean...only if you looked north though. Then we arrived in Tooele! The mountains were green to the east. (you know those ugly mountains west of SLC? yeah the west side of them actually looks good.) All the stores were new and nice and stuff, really nice, although there were some ugly dumps too, i overlooked those. The bowling ally had like 40 lanes! and all of the balls were really new so it didn't hobble down the lane. On the way out of town we saw one of the coolest sunsets ever, the sun was huge and deep red. So yeah, i would rate Tooele a step or two above Spanish Fork. Then we took our friend from Oklahoma and showed him Temple Square. the end.

We accidentally turned onto this road. It was everything we expected to be in Tooele.


The mountains


Our friend and us at the bowling ally.


And finally the sunset.